I Bought Back the Rights to my Life

So here we are, two months into self employment.

I'm truly stunned by how this is all going, the pace of it all. I would have never expected the business to be taking off so well. When I timidly decided to step out and try working for myself, I of course had huge, detailed dreams for this, but the doubt that they would never happen was always there.

All I can say is I am amazed. And grateful. And I'm very scared, still. Lol. My dreams are coming true, but at the same time I still have so many that feel too big to really happen. Time will tell. I am humbled by what these two months have brought and amazed by the level of grace given from my God to try and do all of this.

Passion is the willingness to suffer for something you love.

"I feel like I bought back the rights to my life" - I said that the other day in conversation with a friend and I don't think I realized what I was saying until I heard it out loud. As soon as I said it, it just stuck. I feel like that phrase describes my life currently. Before self employment I thought I had to work all of the hours and earn as much money as possible to stay afloat. I had this need to prove it to myself and everyone around me that I can do this, I can work hard, I can be disciplined and have this "big girl" job. I would lean on the excuse that I have too much debt from college to do anything other then work endless hours making someone else's dream come true. That's just what you have to do in a situation like this, right?

Passion is the willingness to suffer for something you love. I would like to point out a key phrase in that statement, "something YOU LOVE." Why suffer for something you don't love, when you don't have to?

I am learning you do not have to sacrifice your dreams, your time, your life, because of debt, or money or whatever the excuse may be. Everything costs something, so this life of self-employment does not come without a level of sacrifice, suffering and discipline. However, I feel like it is a righteous suffering, putting the work into something I love, to provide a life I truly love. I love my life! 

You have the right to say "no" and change everything to do what brings you joy.

Time is so precious, do what fuels you. Do what makes you feel whole, happy. You have the right to say no and change everything to do what brings you joy. Do it, please! Our lives are sacred gifts given from God. Realize how valuable you and your dreams are. Take ownership.

I will end with a verse that has been ringing in my heart, I'm slowly learning the rhythm of it. 

"God hasn't invited us into a disorderly, unkept life. But into something holy and beautiful- As beautiful on the inside as the outside."

1 Thessalonians 4:7, the message. 

A key book that has been so good to read lately is Present Over Perfect, I highly recommend it.